Young spring chicken

I tried to show my students that I was once cool (kind of). It was the heat of March madness and college basketball and our school was a frenzy with door decorating competitions and assemblies, etc. I have this picture of me that for about two glorious weeks graced the uiowa.edu website. It’s me just casually chatting on the old capitol steps with some strangers. It’s the most publicity and fame I’ll ever get, and my legs are tan, so I really don’t mind showing it.

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They didn’t really respond in any particular way, but I know that deep down (way deep) they were like “wow, cool”

I lovingly referred to myself as a young spring chicken at that point in my life, which did receive a light smattering of giggles- probably more out of confusion than anything but hey- It’s a tough crowd so I’ll take all the laughs they give me. (English question- would a semi-colon work in that sentence? What about this one?)

I figured it was time for a bit of a jaw/ braces update since a non family member noticed that my teeth “look pretty straight” and said “your braces are cute” to which I replied “you can have them!”

The end is totally in sight now. I think. I’m not the best communicator but sometimes leaving the orthodontist I’m left with more questions…did he mean THIS June? Also what is June really? That’s a full month. Is it like June 5th or June 29th? Is there a June 31st? If there is, it could totally be then and still technically be June.  I also don’t ask because I thought I was going to get my braces off in February, so I clearly have no sense of time or how braces work, etc.

My sisters poppin baby shower also happened just last weekend, so it was a chance for others to check in, see how the whole chin situation was doing. Easy answer is no change, no feeling. Complicated answer is that sometimes I think it’s getting better but sometimes I spill coffee down my chin and then have makeup on most of my face but have a slightly reddish brown chin from a combo of the coffee and attempting to scrub it off, mainly just removing my makeup but somehow not the coffee . #cutestteacher #everyonehasacrushonme100%

If your curious about the emojis and how much fun they can be, just pop over to amazon.com and search up photo booth props. The poop emoji was popular, and I unfortunately thought it was a good idea to bring to school and now the poop emoji has gone missing. The others are safe.

Photo update: The usual before surgery/before braces photo on the left. Photo from today on the right.

The photo on the left is from about 1-2 months ago I think. Not any huge differences…maybe smiling with my mouth closed is getting slightly less awkward and lopsided. Just 2 more months (approx) and I will be flashing my pearly whites all around town. Get ready for the summer of Emma. I certainly am.

Just thought I’d close out with this quote that resonated with all that’s going on in the media/ world. If anyone has any suggestions for me on how to volunteer or do something that doesn’t require donating money I would love to know.

xoxo"People don't want to hear the truth because they don't want their illusions destroyed." - Friedrich Nietzsche:

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Classic February

I bought a candle at Target today after school called “classic” which is a blend of mahogany, tangerine and vanilla. I guess I could find a way to interpret that as being “me” ….woodsy, less common but just as flavorful orange, too nice? Ehhh, better not. Smells decent though. Also, did I go to Target to buy a candle? Of course not

This has been anything but a classic February for me. Living alone is just a breeze and a dream. Time in that sense is whizzing by. It’s already been two months which feels like a lot and a little amount of months. I feel pretty settled aside from the fact that I have no mixing bowls or pans to bake things in. I just put everything in foil and then I feel like a jazzy mom in a foil commercial that is like “All right gang, no clean up!” but then the camera goes off and there are still like 900 other dishes that were somehow used to make chicken in the oven. In foil. Also mug cakes are a thing so it’s like, why change?

It’s been 7 months since my surgery now, and to absolutely sound like a broken record, I still have no feeling in my lower chin/lip area. I’m less prone to spilling but I’m super careful. It’s also not like I am/ was/ ever will be putting lipstick on on the go without a mirror. That is the person I WISH that I was but will never be.

Jetting off to a meeting in lipstick. So grown up.

Today as my students practiced the future tense I was like “quick, how old you will you be in 10 years!?” and after a little bit of math prompting (Me saying the only possible ages…24-28) I was like “wow, you’ll be like me!”

Except they were writing things like you will be married, driving a cool car, you will live in a nice house, you will eat in and out burger (big dreamers) etc… All of the things that you think will happen, and honestly do happen for most people.So yeah, everyone gets an A.

Also funny to see the boys imagining themselves as married men and looking absolutely horrified. I reminded them that they have a choice….

Below, an artifact. I got some tips to not grade things I can’t read, or hand it back and say  to do it again…but I myself have terrible…mostly illegible handwriting that my students try to take notes from. #sorry.
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Other updates in my life include my trainer slowly becoming a person that I reference a lot which feels like a friend, but I’m not sure. I have conquered certain machines and exercises that I didn’t even know existed and I hope to have an actual leg muscle poke out by the spring. Ideally both legs. I don’t know if I have a leg role model, but I’m about to look one up and get back to you. My life model is John Legends wife because…

This is the first year of teaching where I not only feel like I can have an outside life- but sometimes I really have one. I workout. I get dinner with friends- DURING THE WEEK (It’s happened at least twice). I’m not constantly stressed. I should probably be more stressed out all things considered, but I’m going the no stress route for the time being. For example I’ve already hit my budget for February and there are quite a few days left. I was doing a lot of #treatyoself.

And everyone’s favorite update, my big smushy face. I thought I had/have an eyeball problem since as you will note my eye on the right side is squinty (or one half eye size smaller). I can only assume it is because I have more cheek over there. I think that’s unrelated to surgery and I just have a weird ass face, so if you are getting this surgery worried you will end up crooked, that’s literally only me.

Fun fact is that not many (or potentially 1%) of people knew that I could not breathe with my mouth closed before this whole process. Now I can really see that in the picture on the left. I can see how hard it is for me to have my mouth closed to smile. Also if you’re not me, you may not see any difference at all, which is especially fine considering that you are not me.

Also can we get a slow clap for how hilarious Alliance bakery is?

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Loving the neighborhood and exploring, but also ready to take a nap until April 10th.

xoxo

Your story

Today I’m feeling a little bit of Hamilton, a dash of a feel good e-mail, and a pinch of reflective on why I’m a big baby about getting evaluated.

I hope you will go out and let stories happen to you, and that you will work them, water them with your blood and tears and you laughter till they bloom, till you yourself burst into bloom.

– Clarissa Pinkola Estes 

I usually get pretty depresso after getting observed at work. I’m sure everyone goes through that feeling because I know of very few people that expect to give or get feedback along the lines of “great job, keep doing what your doing because you are a perfect angel.” But on the other hand, it probably couldn’t hurt to say?

I mean, that’s my mentality when I workout – which is totally a thing now that I live across the street from a gym-AND JOINED IT. I’m as pleased as can be that I actually arrive at the gym, in a semi cute workout outfit and last for a whole hour. The actual workout boils down to about 30 minutes but I stretch it out because it’s like “well, I’m already here…might as well roll around on this yoga mat in some form of stretching ab laying pose.” Plus an hour just seems like a better amount of time.

When I joined the gym they did that thing where you get a free training session, so it’s like damn, pressure, better do it. It’s free. But I did the usual like Oh no, we have to reschedule approximately 4 times. Then last night I forgot to text back confirming our session today so he was going to cancel if I didn’t reply. So when I replied I was like, I totally understand if you want to cancel and never reschedule. And he was like no worries, see you at 8.

OH. SNAP.

Trapped. But here I am, feeling literally amazing (pronounced a la Chris Traeger from Parks and Rec).

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We did start talking about my “fitness goals” which I couldn’t help but laugh. So I pulled some stuff out of my butt from the past about how I used to run 5ks and I did the shamrock shuffle which is an 8k. So the trainer tried to dig a little deeper, figuring I like running, so he asks…

“Cool, why did you decide to do 5ks?”

me: “Because I don’t think anyone should run any farther than that. I never want to run a marathon.”

trainer: Starts talking about the movie 300 and running, and ancient Greece.

me: ……(in my brain remembering that my actual new years resolution was to become a person that drinks more bourbon). 

 

We ended up getting along great though, and he is super knowledgeable and showed me all of these creepy pictures of him competing in body building competitions. I didn’t think we were close enough yet to ask why you have to dye yourself orange to participate,  but I ended up purchasing some more sessions with him, so I will keep you all posted.

In other news my lower lip and chin are still trying to drive me nuts by remaining tingly. However, I don’t have to eat with a mirror anymore. I still find the occasional dribble on my chin, but I’m more comfortable in how to manage my bites. I have stopped taking selfies because I’m waiting until I actually notice more of a difference in my face and the differences have been so slight that I don’t want to get frustrated. It is good to look back where it all started though.

In way other news I got bored one night and actually clicked on a Facebook ad because they can read into your soul and know your deepest thoughts that you don’t even know that you have and decided to try this thing called stitch fix. I got my first package and let me tell you, it did come at a good time when I needed my spirits lifted, but I really geeked out more than I usually would over clothes. If you know me at all, I actually HATE shopping. It’s so weird. I can’t explain it. I like having clothes and I’m into style and what not but I have approximately zero endurance. Grocery shopping is my jam. I go down every aisle. Twice.

Anyways stitch fix is like having a personal stylist for poor-ish people. You take a little quiz and then you say if you have any specific wishes for that month or however often you want to do it and then they send you stuff they think you might like. You just have to decide if you want to buy it and then you send the rest back. Super easy, fun, cool, exciting, etc.

I’m going to sign off before I lose this weird workout momentum that I got that made me feel excited at the thought of cleaning my apartment. PS Living alone is the best thing that anyone can do in their life ever. If you missed that experience you seriously need to move out of your house that you share with your husband or wife and be like, look, we can still be married but this is super important. Bye.

Big shout out to all of the women, children, cute dogs, men, and everyone else (half women, whole martian, clowns, etc.) marching today. Power to the people.

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Great decisions

I have had some very “if you give a mouse a cookie” moments lately. It’s a technical term that I use to describe realizations regarding things that one cannot do. For example, one cannot make pasta without a pot to boil the water. A strainer is also a luxury item in an emergency, but really pretty helpful when making pasta.

So I get to Target (#dangerous) and I head towards the aisle housing the pots and pans. En route to get my little pot, I realize that I need a dish towel if I plan on drying the pot afterwards. And it should be cute because it will be displayed. Once I get the pot (is there another word I could be using? I’m not talking about drugs, but it could seem that way out of context), I  realize that I may also need to uncork my wine that I will likely drink with the pasta. And once I see that, I see a lovely turquoise can opener. I need it to be top of the line because I have had full on giving up on eating experiences opening cans. Easy is a problem you can throw money at.

So this experience continued on until I had to make two trips  from car to apartment, one of which included various stops and handle adjustments and hipster stares.

As I lamented the fact that until two days ago, I didn’t even own silverware, my cousin said, “yeah, but you lived in Spain? Would you take that away to have silverware?” #wisdom.  I’m not entirely sure that I can still use that as an excuse though, because although my memory doesn’t serve for much, Facebook likes to remind me that Spain happened about 4 years ago. Am I still within the window of using that as an excuse as to why I have as many belongings as Ron Swanson? The thing is that I’ve always had roommates. I always counted on them to have the stuff, and they delivered. Again, not a drug reference.

It’s only been three days but I count living by myself among the top three decisions of my life. The other two being going to Iowa and selecting La Rioja on a whim. All of these decisions were arrived at with very little thought. I think I probably convinced myself and others around me that there was a lot of deep thought, but there wasn’t. I won’t necessarily advocate for  living your life without thinking things through, but sometimes it’s not worth all of the extra stress. I have anxiety about other really useless things, so it balances out.

I haven’t taken many photos of the new place yet since it’s still a work in progress, but I can share one snapshot, and then other photo updates.

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I made it through the first week of break warding off the inevitable sickness that comes when my body realizes it can be “at rest” and now I have used the first day of 2017 to research pet adoption, apply to adopt a bull dog (oops?), eat as many emergen-c tablets as the bottle allows and slam throat coat tea as if it tasted good.

Tomorrow I will finally have cable and official internet. Currently ‘borrowing’ from Alliance bakery. Plan on  being a loyal customer and good neighbor, so it’s fine. I’ll probably also attempt to not die in my laundry room that looks like the set of the movie Saw.

P.s- Jaw update: Still numb in my lower lip and chin area, but not as bad as before. I can eat without a mirror but I still get the occasional dribble so I have to just check  myself often. I do get tingles when I move my mouth around so I’m taking that to be a good sign. I haven’t officially hit the 6 month mark, so fingers crossed that my nerves give me a special anniversary gift of growth.

A trip down memory lane.

Week 19 update- aka about 4 months

When people have children it seems they become the type of people to say “My child is 900 weeks old”

And childless people are left calculating exactly what the heck that means in terms of the way everyone else measures their age-years. So is he…3?

I started thinking about it because my sister has announced to the “world” that she is expecting a little baby boy! img_20161119_134501

I was “team girl” but in terms of the money that will be left in my bank account after not buying all of the adorable bite sized girl outfits, I have rejoiced with “team boy.”

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Looks like our very own prince Walter will have to start being a little nicer to his tia loca if he wants the amount of love and attention he is used to. I pretend like I will reject him, but he is irresistible. Just look at this cozy photo of us watching the Thanksgiving Day parade!

And in other news I finally have some photos to update. I tried to get some where I am actually wearing makeup or at least looking publicly acceptable.

The photo on the left is probably from around week 6 or 7….and the photo on the right is from last week. The big difference is it is getting easier to smile with my lips closed without fully being able to feel them…and I also have 3 pounds of Sephora makeup on in the right side photo.

 

Below on the left is a photo from before surgery and before braces, and on the right is a photo that I took today and filtered the shit out of so that I looked soft and glow-y.

Something interesting that Dr. Reid told me regarding facial recognition is that if you think that I look the same, it is because you recognize me more by my eyes/ nose. That is the area of the face that you really look at, more so than the chin. I have come to this conclusion more than a handful of times on here, and I totally understand that I “look the same” but, I like to also recognize the fact that I am not the same…and actually don’t feel that I look the same as before. I know this because it is my face and not just a photo of it.

And I’ll leave you with a nice little brace face photo memory. On the left is the day that I got my braces on, and on the right was taken about a week ago in the RUSH bathroom. #photoshoot

Also I will be moving in less than a month! Where to?! Well, let’s just say I should probably buy a couple of beanies.

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xoxo